Posts Tagged ‘Classic’

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Letters to the Editor

September 29, 2009
Yanni prepares for a hard-charging Creed cover.

Yanni prepares for a hard-charging Creed cover.

[Note: It is the policy of this paper to edit letters for length, clarity and to generally make the letter-writers appear more ignorant.]

To the music editor of the New Bedford Gazette:

This letter concerns your recent review of the Yanni concert, which you gave a 3 out of 5 star rating. While I realize that Yanni’s blistering sexuality and limp-wristed piano stylings are an acquired taste, I have to wonder whether your reviewer saw the same spectacular concert that I did.

I’m sure we all felt that the St. Jude School for the Blind’s auditorium was hardly the most majestic setting for musical royalty such as this. However, it did hold a certain amount of quaint charm and metal folding chairs. The promoters made the most of the limited space and I’m sure the returning students will appreciate what was done to the venue even as it wreaks havoc on their spatial awareness.

The reviewer states that the “unretracted basketball hoops” detracted from the setting. I realize that not every venue can be as breathtaking as the Acropolis (as documented in his best-selling DVD). At times the arena struggled to compete with even lesser-known performances, such as his appearances at the Apollo and the second event tent at Glastonbury (which found his gig sandwiched between Vampire Weekend and a re-formed Haircut 100).

The reviewer also referred to Yanni’s “bland stylings” and “watered-down New Age ivory-tinkling.” While his music will certainly never compare to the “hard rock” and “hard rap” that the reviewer is no doubt used to, I think it was a low blow for him to point out the unfortunate moment when a clearly exhausted Yanni urinated on the piano.

There were so many electric moments that would warrant at least an extra star or two:

  • His fantastic selection of covers, including Nick Cave’s Curse of Millhaven, Weezer’s Hash Pipeand John Tesh’s Theme from Entertainment Tonight (Slight Return).
  • Late in the show, an obviously inebriated (and exhausted) Yanni “dropped trou” and gave us all a tantalizing glimpse of “Little Yanni” and some magnificently coiffed pubic hair.
  • His terrific Jerry Lee Lewis impression, in which he broke free from his usual repertoire to bang his piano and 14-year old cousin, roughly in that order. The inadvertent electrical fire that threatened to consume the threesome (Yanni, piano, cousin) was just icing on the cake.

We all know that Yanni put in a performance for the ages that night, one that cannot be smeared by a middling review or his string of insults and slurs that closed out the evening. Fortunately for Yanni, he will continue his incredible career, despite doubting journalists and as for the slurs, they would only offend those familiar with thousands of years of Greek history. And homosexuals.

Sincerely,

-CLT

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