Top 50 Tracks of 2010: Diversion #2 featuring Nobunny & DJ AlpoDecember 10, 2010
The road Alan Truitt took from avid blogger to bedroom producer is a long, if uninteresting, one.
Truitt left the dog-eat-dog world of office blogging for the sunnier climes of professional writing, having been lured by the seamy promise of noteriety and steady paychecks. He left behind a legacy of woefully (and perhaps willfully) mismanaged comment threads, pushing the limits of the semi-functional WordPress software.
Leaving WordPress in charge of filling his open position, Alan esconced himself in his office with an eye on conquering the music world (the other eye was still being detained by Customs). WordPress responded (after being nudged awake during their 3-6 pm “siesta”) by acquiring LiveJournal’s
11 million 6 million 200,000 12,000 seven active blogs.
Now trafficking under the name DJ Alpo, Truitt’s first project was a much-needed extension of NoBunny’s 1-1/2 minute rewrite of Green Day’s Longview, Do the Fuck Yourself. Sensing that the only way to make a good thing better was to trigger endless loops, Alan attacked this remix effort with his trademark blend of 90% enthusiasm and 10% skill, much in the same way that he attacked the “G-spot issue,” according to an ex-girlfriend who agreed to be interviewed only after assurances were given that she would probably not recall this conversation if she continued drinking at this pace.
“If nothing else, he’s always had plenty of enthusiasm. He went searching for my g-spot for well over 90 minutes, trying various insertions and positions, occasionally leaving the room altogether. I offered to guide him or at least shout ‘warmer’ or ‘colder,’ but he insisted it was important that he do this himself.
He worked so hard at this that I felt flattered by the incessant attention. Flattered and a little sore by the time all was said and done. I remember being awoken a few times by shouts of ‘Eureka!’ which were usually followed by confused noises and quiet swearing.”
[Author’s note: Alan has refused to comment on this statement, saying only that he “doesn’t remember it quite that way.” He added, “Of course, I was doing a ton of peyote at the time. As I am now.” Shortly thereafter, his publicist pushed him into a back room with an assortment of muted threats and swearing.
The official statement (via his publicist): “Alan will not be able to respond to any further questions for the next 24-36 hours, provided I get to the rest of his stash before he does.” This was followed by a calculatedly blank stare and an inoffensive half-smile that didn’t quite reach his publicist’s eyes. There was also some nearly indetectable flinching as a muffled shout of “Holy shitballs!” escaped from the back room, followed nearly immediately with, “Merle! You’ve got to see this!” followed by the sound of something presumably expensive shattering.
A moment or two of uncomfortable silence was broken by Alan’s muted and awed exclamation, “Wow. That’s a lot of blood.” This led into some maniacal giggling from the rear of the house and an even more calculatedly blank stare from Truitt’s publicist.]
As for the track itself: it’s an assortment of truncated loops that serve the onanistic metaphor well. Nobunny may have demonstrated that this idea could only be stretched for 90 seconds but DJ Alpo’s remix boldly states that there’s no effective limit on what a combination of unbridled enthusiasm, some low-end software and a bit of free time can accomplish.
The headful of peyote may not be wholly to blame for the resulting track, but it certainly explains the “What a mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve,” scrawled in blood across the wall of the back room.
[Author’s note, part 2: Alan’s publicist declined further comment, stating “At this point the job has become more apologist than publicist.” Alan’s ex-girlfriend could not be awakened for further comment.]
[A personal note: The elusive MEK shot me a copy of Nobunny’s “Do the Fuck Yourself,” stating that at 90 seconds, it was the perfect length. I agreed but stated that I (being the clubhead I am) would be on the lookout for the extended, eight minute remix. So, for no other reason than his generally being awesome, MEK whipped up this remix in the course of an afternoon. How kickass is that!]