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Top 50 Tracks of 2010: Golden Ages – It Doesn’t Mean Shit

November 28, 2010

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35. Golden Ages – It Doesn’t Mean Shit.mp3

Fuck all the genre bullshit. Golden Ages is here to make some high-quality electronica and they’ll be damned if they need yer trusty “All Knowing Guide to Electronica Standards and Guidelines, 10th Edition” to “help” him along.

It’s a distorted to hell and back, flanged-up piece of electro-wonk (not to be confused with “-wank,” which is a Rick Wakeman side project), buzzing joyfully and noisily in your ears. Is that water trickling along in the background? And did I just hear the track title swing by with little fanfare? (Yes. And yes.)

Yeah. This shit’s Golden.

The rest of the Top 50.

-CLT

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9 comments

  1. Where were we? I enjoyed the Mater Suspiria and was delighted to learn that there even was such a thing as a witch house/drag movement. If I were into drag I’d for sure be into witch house drag. I always fancied the more Pagan/Gaia religions because I’m weird like that.

    The Vasalines also stood out to my amateurish ears, but I’m not sure I could tell you why. It certainly wasn’t because I have a thing for Vaseline, because I don’t. It’s too hard to wash off. And one could end up with more chafing (due to the hateful loofa) than one would have had anyway if one would have never applied the hateful Vaseline in the first place.

    I also rocked out in my old man way to Space Invaders, Holy Fuck(!!!) and this last one. I’m getting all geared up (that doesn’t mean what it used to) to see these get better and better as the countdown continues. I can hear the South Park version of Kasey Kasem now.

    You are the one who’s golden CLT, golden!


    • I’m glad you dug all those tracks, Scott. I took kind of a swift turn into a dark alley for three or four tracks but the sunlight is starting to crest with the next several selections, most of which won’t be of the witch house variety.

      In my opinion, the picks do get better and better, but I’m hardly a reliable narrator and my bias towards my own impeccable taste could safely be considered “slanted.”


  2. Aquatic acoustics? That just whets my appetite for songs that incorporate fire, wind, earth and, what the hell, quantum mechanics. I’m already dreaming of music with…animals…food…VIDEO POKER MACHINES!!!!!!!!!!!!


    • Quantum mechanic music might veer too close to math rock, one of my nemeses. However, video poker music could be a game-changer in today’s tight entertainment marker. I’m off to the patent office!


  3. Nice little mood-song. Nothing to get too excited about in either direction. Actually, you could have told me it was made in the pre-electronic late 60’s early 70’s and (one or two little giveaway sounds aside) I would have believed it.

    This comment is basically an excuse for me to slam the music sub-genre obsession, particularly of the electronically inclined. They seem intent on self-validation though genre making, as if the more sub-genres it has the more valid the overall genre -and everyone in it- is.

    Step #1. Make some music within few/no lyrics. If you have to, spend a minute or two hitting random keys on a synth, distort it and play it on a loop for 20 minutes.

    Step #2. Use a Random Word Generator http://watchout4snakes.com/creativitytools/RandomWord/RandomWordPlus.aspx to come up with the sub-genre you will specialize in. In my first try, I came up with Aging Retrieval Library, which works about as well as most.

    Step #3. Watch as you rise to the top of the charts of the sub-genre you created out of thin air. If need be, hand out free E with every disk. Stick enough E into anybody and they’ll fall in love with anything.

    At some point, every group will be its own genre because, as we all know, everyone is a precious little snowflake all created special and unique in God’s eyes. Please excuse me while I barf.


    • Well, that’s why I run a blog: it gives the commenters someplace to drop off all their unpublished essays. Not that said essays don’t make solid points about rampant musical overspecialization.

      Let’s face it: there’s only so many tags I’m willing to type out. If you want to be the new face of whatever the fuck, at least try to get some other spineless bands on board with you. I think three bands is all that’s required to get Pitchfork/NME to declare it the next big thing.


    • I think three bands is all that’s required to get Pitchfork/NME to declare it the next big thing.

      That’s where little brothers and kids from Special Ed classes who look up to you come in. Get a couple of them to try the same thing and you got yourself an up and coming genre with yourself at the top of it.

      Well, that’s why I run a blog: it gives the commenters someplace to drop off all their unpublished essays.

      Actually, I do the opposite. I often use my comments on blogs as essays that remain unpublished. I save good blog comments as raw material for possible future use on my own website, should I ever get one. Or, I save them for my own book, should books still exist by the time I get around to compiling one. You are one of the privileged few who are getting original Sedate Me material in its raw form. You are the Bentley’s Miscellany to my Dickens.


  4. This is some of the funniest shit I’ve read in a week.


    • Thanks, elizabeth. I’ll have something up tonight that should top at least my contributions to this comment thread. I can’t speak for SM, mainly because I can hardly get a word in edgewise.



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