Archive for April 9th, 2010

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Motivation

April 9, 2010

Only one thing counts in this world: get them to sign on the line that is dotted. And initial here… here… and here. This page will need to go to a notary public… two more signatures here… sign and date here… and… one more… here.

While you were out, we secretly switched your coffee with Closer’s Brand Crystals.

You drove here in a Hyundai. I drove here in a leased company vehicle, which prominently features our company name and phone number on the sides. They’re magnetic. That’s free advertising right there.

Now our potential customers no longer have to wonder who it was that crossed three lanes of traffic to flip them off. They’ll be able to put a name to the face that is angrily pointing out their watch to them. And they’ll finally know who’s been calling up their daughter and berating her about her selfishness.

You know what it takes to sell real estate? It takes licensing from accredited agencies. This holds true for any state you wish to sell real estate in. This is a legitimate business, after all.

I’d wish you good luck by I’m not a superstitious person and I really don’t have much sympathy for those who are. I like to say “Be well.”

You see this watch? This watch costs more than your car. You know how I know that? I’ve got a little side business as an appraiser. It gives me a little bit of a buffer zone for those “steak knife” months.

The good news is: you’re fired. No, wait, that’s not good news at all. Let me rephrase that: you’re fired.

-CLT

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